This ANZAC Day we're honoured to share this 2015 piece by Andrew Ferguson.
Honouring Stan Carpenter...
7 hours ago
As Souths fans grapple with the surprise substitute of ?Glory Glory? with Russell Crowe?s version of ?The Real Thing? as the run-on song, we should very well question the merits of Rock? threatening invasion into the core of Rugby League. It?s gone way too far.
I accepted an opportunity to check out the half time action. I was shocked at how far Rock songs of yesterday have become the typical vernacular of today.
(May Phil Spector strip me down, grease me up and give Molly Meldrum the green light to do as he pleases if the following is not what I witnessed.)
?Settle down? settle down everyone? hollered the coach jotting down the last of his thoughts of the first half. The room hushed to the dim of liniment slapping on muscle and the cracking of Gatorade bottle tops.
?Listen to me every one you,? said the coach, peering over black sunglasses, eyeing everyone in turn. ?We got a lot of lot of lot of lot of work to do.?
?Tell us about it coach; we?re being murdered out there!? exclaimed the bloodied captain, groping around his face, looking for a missing eye. ?I wanna beat on the brats with baseball bats!?
?Forget about your women? Screamed the coach, slamming his folder down hard upon the wooden bench. A slight grin appearing on his face.
?I?m thirsty,? said the Rookie, looking around for something to drink.
?No, no water can?Today you're working for the man? declared the coach.
The players looked up as if he was onto something. I sensed the tension building as the masseur too, stopped for a moment. The captain found his eye and proceeded to pop it back in.
?Tell us coach. Tell us what to do.? Said the captain, twirling his eyeballs around and blinking.
?Well pick up your feet, we got a deadline to meet, I'm gonna see you make it on time... Now, don't relax, I want elbows and backs. I wanna see everybody from behind.? Said the coach, emphasising each point with a jab of a pen on pad.
The Rookie looked a little puzzled. ?Why coach?? He hesitated for a moment and then added. ?You know, man, when I was a young man in high school. You believe it or not? I wanted to play football for the coach?
The coach crossed his arms. Stared at the young rookie and said ?'Cause you're working for the man?Working- for- the man. Gotta make him a hand. When you're working for the man?
The rookie looked excited. ?Well I'm pickin' em' up. And I'm layin' 'em down
A sudden wall of noise filled the room as the players talked animatedly. Eagerly spurring each other on with back slaps and hand shakes.
?A little less conversation, a little more action please.? The coach yelled over the top of the others, bringing the voices down a notch or two. ?All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me. A little more bite and a little less bark. A little less fight and a little more spark?
?HOORAHHH!? The players roared in unison. I heard one player turn to his masseuse and whisper ?I believe he's gonna work me into the ground?. The Masseuse pushed his head back down with one hand then jabbed and rubbed the silenced player?s right rhomboid.
? Coach? did you see how I pulled to the left, and I heaved to the right. I wanted to kill him but it wouldn't be right?
Suddenly, the door swung open. An NRL official popped his head in and yelled. ?One Minute?. The players rushed to finish off odds and ends, tying up shoelaces, adjusting shorts and receiving last second individual instructions.
Souths went on to score 52 unanswered points.
I woke up. I sighed.
?Glory Glory (to South Sydney)? was introduced in 1967. Johnny Young wrote the lyrics to ?The Real Thing? in 1969.
?The Real Thing? is a clever pun. It heralds in the notion that Souths are ?for real?. It also fits in nicely with our Major Sponsor, Real Insurance and not to mention incorporating Russell Crowe further by allowing him to record it.
It hasn?t worked and won?t. Why?
Club signature songs need to hit their mark. The lyrics need to reverberate and inspire and thusly, need to be written by the fans for the fans. We?ve been dealt a corporate low blow by a marketing department hell bent in rushing through the ?evolution?.
Lets win games first. Please?
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